To the Mom Without a Diagnosis

Your child is not an island. Except in those quiet moments when it feels so true that he is. When you have Googled and Facebook grouped and lurked on message boards and found not one soul like his. Maybe if you type his symptoms in differently, if you switch “hypoglycemia” with “blood sugar” or leave […]

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The Words I’ve Needed

Sometimes life is funny. Like when Elie Mae tells me she can’t go to bed because her baby needs to potty. Me: What in thee world? Elie: The baby feels like she has to poop. Me: Elie, WHAT in thee world?! Elie (talks to her baby): I’m gonna be sad if you fall in. Sometimes […]

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To The Un-Indictable

We have borne the burden of proof. Buried it. Our bullet-ridden bodies not enough to poke holes in your privilege. Years ago, The Elders held picnics. Pack a lunch; kill a darky. Crunch a carrot between your teeth as his bones roast. His body s w i n g s… Then still. It’s Oprah’s Favorite […]

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On How to Feel

I had a dream the other night. A nightmare, really, in which I received a phone call from Paul that broke my chest wide open, as if my ribs were but papier-mâché, my lungs a dangling diorama. “Do you know where Elie is?” he asked. “Tell me you’re kidding,” I said. “Isn’t she with you?” […]

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